Viva la Difference!

When they got married, they thought it was wonderful having so much in common.  They liked the same movies and music, and went to the same church. They both liked the Seahawks, and thought baseball was slow and boring.  They liked the same coffee and thought it was fantastic they liked each other’s friends. She laughed at his jokes and he told her all the time she was beautiful.  Life was great.  They had so much in common.

But now they’ve been married for six years and see so many differences.  He stays up late and sleeps in till lunchtime.  She can’t stay up past ten and gets up every morning, six sharp.  He likes a cold beer and she won’t drink anything stronger than lemonade.  He can wear the same clothes for a week and she can’t stand wearing anything twice.  He’s OK with a lot of things lying around and she is Miss Neat and Orderly.

How did it happen that when they got married, they didn’t see all the differences between them?

Many times, when we are “IN LOVE” we see only the things we share in common and overlook the differences.  We have grace for (or overlook) the differences in each other.  We tend not to notice he doesn’t pick anything up or she is always cleaning something.

Photo by Katia Grimmer-Laversanne

But keep this in mind:  Many couples marry someone who is their opposite.  He is loud, boisterous, and the life of the party and she is quiet, thoughtful, and reserved.  He is careless with spending and she is frugal, and tracks bills and expenses.  He likes camping and being in the outdoors, and she likes the kind of camping that looks a just like a condo.

Some of you have probably heard the expression “viva la difference” which means it is good that there is a difference between two people, especially  between a man and a woman.  The difference is good.  Where he is weak, she is probably strong.  He’s not good at balancing the checkbook but she is.  He can’t even open a can of beans and you’re Martha Stewart in the kitchen.  You can’t fix the leaky faucet and he’s Mister Handyman on steroids.

Yes!  Your differences can be a blessing.

Celebrate your differences and don’t look at them as a liability but rather an asset.

Together you accomplish more.

Photo by Otávio Brito

And where your differences cause conflict, work at loving compromise.  For example, you may not like camping, but he enjoys the outdoors.  Make a special effort to be accommodating.  Show your love by stretching and do those things out of your norm.  It will communicate love and a willingness to share your lives together.

Both of you should be willing to say, “Viva la Difference!”